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Welcome to the Cheap seats - Free holidays!
Fancy developing an unhealthy addiction to pricey organic coffee and cheap lager? And all for free? Then get your cheap ass over to Hawaii's Kona coffee farm on the Big Island.
From the air it looks like a giant chocolate brownie, but from the ground it's all about the sounds. Wrapping your jaw muscles around names like Kealakekua Bay - where Captain Cook was murdered!- Holualoa and awapuh - something you wash your hair with apparently- is the first part.
But the real fun starts on this WWOOFing trip (that's Willing Workers on Organic Farms to you - basically free labour in exchange for a free holiday) where you're handed a machete and told to go forth into the banana plantations, and hack away contentedly.
After which you get to chill on the terrace, devour fresh mangoes, swig cheap lager and get as much Kona coffee into you as possible. This stuff sells for about £50 a pound so you'll not be buying it back in the real world.
For all the skinny on WWOOFing check out www.wwoof.org with flights from London to Honolulu with American Airlines from about £600. For details on inter-island flights with Hawaiian Airlines, go to www.hawaiianair.com.