This Twilight business is getting out of hand

Edinburgh’s got Potter, The Lake District’s got Wordsworth, and now it seems Oregon and Washington’s got Twilight, as if there wasn’t enough rubbish in the States to keep you from going crazy.

Now, your kids and probably your girlfriend, (the one with the wandering eye) will want to go trekking through the vast, (and empty?) landscapes of Oregon and Washington states on America’s western seaboard.

Apparently this is all where Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight saga is set – yes the one that has everybody re-evaluating Vampires as ‘those attractive looking veggie types from down the road.’ – Whatever happened to The good Count Dracula from Transylvania, and Gary Oldman’s genius depiction of him in Coppola’s classic?

Not only will you be made go to the States, you’ll have to camp for 11 nights!, no doubt pretend to be ‘scared’ and then hand over 700 bills for the pleasure.

The best thing all round is to cut them off at the pass, book a bus and donkey tour of the inner workings of Romania and really scare the pants off them.

Block access to Trek America on your computer and if you see one of their brochures coming in the mail, eat it!

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